I sit quietly in the corner of my room, analysing anything and everything. It's in the middle of such dark nights when I wish to confront my demons. I try talking but, my voice gets choked up. Maybe the burden of emotions is too heavy to be voiced out. I divert my mind and stare at the intricate details of my wall. Shades of pink, everywhere. The lights illuminate the pink walls, making it all bright and beautiful. I wonder if it could reflect some brightness in my life too. I sigh and look at the wall clock. The constant ticking of the clock in the dead silence scares me. Time is sinking with each second and I am still in the middle of nowhere. I try keeping calm but, fail hopelessly at not succumbing to my vulnerabilities.
My smile denies to mask my pain. Loneliness grips me hard which I always try covering up with a tag of solitude. The delusion of happiness helps me cope up during day. However, nights have a different story. Away from the chaos of the world, my mind gets trapped in its own dark thoughts. I wish to escape yet I see nothing but, dead ends everywhere. I have been dying, one moment at a time yet I hope I find my existence, someday soon enough.
© Sheerin Naz.
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